DEMANDMENTS

There shall be very limited use of recreational mind or mood altering materials. This includes any man-made chemical substances, beer and other alcohols, street drugs, and tobacco. The use of certain intoxicants are permissible in times of celebration. Marijuana is completely exempt from this teaching. Coffee is permitted, but discouraged. The intoxicated state makes the believer susceptible to possession by nefarious spirits. Many indulgers have fallen by the wayside, directly into a living, breathing hell.

There shall be no marking or branding of the flesh for any purpose whatsoever. This teaching focuses on tattoos, plastic surgery, gender conversion procedures, and other forms of body modification. Those who have already disobeyed this teaching and cannot reverse the procedure may redeem oneself through disavowal, repentance, atonement, and absolution. This teaching exempts cosmetic make-up products and other material items, which are only moderately discouraged.

There shall be no celebration of any birthday, holiday, or any other observance, especially not those supported, publicized, or ratified by the United States government. This includes New Years Eve, Halloween, Easter, Christmas, Hanukkah, Thanksgiving, and any other mass psychosis that serves to warp the very concept of celebration. Personal milestones and other goal-oriented anniversary celebrations are completely exempt from this teaching. It is well expected that most believers have already disobeyed this teaching. Many believers will be compelled by family members to attend holiday gatherings. Attendance of family gatherings is permissible, and thus atonement for this teaching is inherent.

There shall be no extremist diets or regimens. Believers are discouraged from consuming sugar. All other targeted branded lifestyle diet plans such as carnivore, vegetarian, gluten free, low carb, atkins, paleo, et al. are considered a self betrayal, a distraction, and disrespectful to oneself. Fasting and exercising are free to be practiced at will. Veganism is exempt from this teaching if its intent is to respect and preserve animal life.

There shall be no further โ€œCancellationsโ€ of any one individual. The punishment for betraying a loyal ally or fellow believer is complete and total exile from any and all communication with other believers. You will be blacklisted from society and left for dead. As it was the fate you had wished upon another, and in doing so, you have cursed yourself to that very fate.

There shall be no individual who influences you before Rob. When it comes time for you to answer for your actions, you will be questioned alone. Your greatest friends and allies will not be there to speak for you in the end. The decisions that you make in life are yours alone. And the opinion of those other believers alone cannot evaluate, change, or define your path in any way. Your parents are not necessarily reliable or responsible just because they are your elders. A believer must commit to their actions, dismissing the labels of the observers. If a believer does not want to be defined by something, the believer should not partake in that thing. If a believer would be embarrassed and ruined if found committing an act, then it is an act they should not commit.

There shall be no other podcasters, figures, or speakers before Rob. This teaching is the most integral. All other podcasters, comedians, artists, and presenters are snake oil salesmen who will say anything for money. These โ€œpeopleโ€ intend to sell you penis pills, eBooks, kitchen appliances, erotic escort services, diet pills, and other assorted self-help pyramid schemes. These โ€œpeopleโ€ do not love you the way Rob loves you. Thus, it is imperative that you immediately cancel any subscription to any monthly mass media communication platform, especially those that operate by broadcasting commercial advertisements. This is including but not limited to Netflix, Apple, Amazon, Disney+, HBO, Patreon, OnlyFans, Spotify, SiriusXM, any and all sports leagues, magazine subscriptions, cable and satellite television services, and any other donation-based monthly or annual membership of any kind. These 24 hour communication platforms are a great source of trauma to you, and were specifically coded to poison your mind and curse your soul.